Mantra "Be The Girlfriend"

I decided this year to make a different kind of New Years resolution. Rather than weight loss, exercise, or focusing on a religious aspect of my life as I usually do, I determined to be a girlfriend--to my husband.

It has become a running joke between he and I, but it is a serious goal of mine.  I have seen over the past 20+ years how my attitude as a happy, easy going, fun-loving, accepting girl has morphed into.... well, mom and wife. (And sometimes not such a nice one of either.)

Not that being a mom is a bad thing.  I really LOVE being a mom.  (Someone has got to be mom because there are 4 kids here!)  There is also something really wonderful about being a wife to a man who you can trust, rely on and love.  However, sometimes I wonder with my roll as mom, household manager, event coordinator, counselor, personal assistant, friend, sister, aunt and wife, where did the easy going 20 year old girl go?  You know, the one that adored her guy, listened to him intently, waited by the phone for his call, planned around seeing him, made him cheesecake, and thought of things he would like and did them for him.  The girl that Shawn pursued because, well, I was fantastic.  (Hey, it's my blog!)

Let's face it.  Instead of the adoring girlfriend, I have been the person in Shawn's life pointing out the problems, talking about solving kid issues and scheduling our lives.  While there is definitely a need for my mom/wife persona,  I don't want it to be the only persona that shows up each day. 

While I think every relationship grows and morphs into something that should be comfortable-- especially after 20 years--I also believe that sometimes our relationships unknowingly drift.  We slowly move away
from our best intentions of what we want to be and instead allow our experiences, and frustrations to jade us and cause us to settle for something less and worry about ourselves more.

President Hinckley said “I am satisfied that happiness in marriage is not so much a matter of romance as it is an anxious concern for the comfort and well-being of one’s companion. Any man who will make his wife’s comfort his first concern will stay in love with her throughout their lives and through the eternity yet to come”

I am hoping with this mantra, "be the girlfriend", I will remember the girlfriend, wife and companion that I want to be to Shawn, and think of his well being and comfort first.  Thus remembering to be the woman that he adores, and the one he would choose to marry all over again.  Who knows, maybe he'd let me be his 2nd wife--you know the really pretty trophy wife.

The song "Remind Me" is one of my favorite's right now.  Probably because it fits in nicely with my "Be The Girlfriend" Mantra.
(Click on the link below if you want to listen to it.)
Remind Me Brad Paisley & Carrie Underwood