Joanne

Analogy of the Dishcloth

There are some people who, when your life intersects with theirs, change you simply by virtue of knowing them, and seeing the life they are striving to live.  JoAnne is one such person for me.

My initial acquaintance with her was as name on my Relief Society roster.  I hadn't had a chance to meet her because her health issues prevented her from attending Relief Society.  She was called as my Visiting Teaching District Supervisor in November 2012.  After reporting my VT to her around the 15th of the month, she brought me a knitted dishcloth and thanked me for taking the time to report to her.  That dishcloth was the beginning of my friendship with JoAnne; and is still my favorite cloth.

As I told her how much I liked my cloth a week later, and how I wished I knew how to make one, she replied with her invitation "Well come over to my house, and I will teach you how to make one."  I smiled and thanked her; however I really didn't think more about it for a month or so.  She was going to Salt Lake City to see a doctor over the holidays and we were busy with my daughter’s upcoming wedding.

JoAnne had been struggling with issues with her lungs--years of stain glass work with no mask, and dust from ceramics apparently leaves your lungs with particles of glass, and eventually makes it difficult to use your lungs.   Almost a year ago now, (Jan 2013) I heard that she had been taken to Salt Lake City to be considered for a lung transplant.  The doctor examined her physical heart--which was weakened with the extra stress of pulling the air from her damaged lungs.  He told her that not only would she be unable to survive a lung transplant, but also that her heart may be in emanate danger of failure as well. 

He instructed her that the only way to prolong her life, would be to cart around oxygen everywhere she went, and use it 24-7.  In addition, she would be required to constantly monitor her heart rate and oxygen levels.  Any activity that decreased her oxygen number to less than 75 would have to be eliminated from her daily activities.  Counseling her he added that anything less than 75 would cause further damage to her heart, and shave time off the amount of time he thought she had left.  

Soon afterwards I found the opportunity to take her up on her offer to teach me to knit and crochet. JoAnne patiently talked me through the need to use 100% cotton yarn, emphasizing

Lemonade Stand--Gavin Style

Not many would think a poster with a mine-craft inspired, red-eyed, demon/monster would sell lemonade.  But Gavin does! I guess you'd worry less about the cost.... cause you'd be staring at the monster.

Dear Santa, you have engineers right?

"I have a great idea" Gavin informs me as he walks into the room, a paper and pen in his hand.  "If Santa makes the toys in his workshop, he could totally do this!"  He hands me the drawing.

"Well....." I say stalling and searching my mind for an answer. "I'm not sure Santa takes special requests for toys.  He has so many to make...yeah..um that makes sense right Gavin?" 

"Well its not really that hard.  I just want him to take some parts from this one..." he says pointing from one elaborate bakugan to another "... and add them to this other one.  He doesn't even need different parts.  He already has them to make these toys.  I have written it all down for them."

"Well that seems really logical." I say with no other thoughts or ideas coming to my mind. 

"Okay then, it's settled." Gavin smiles as he turns to exit. "We'll get this diagram to the elves tonight so they can get to work." 

Tropical Bars

I made some pineapple tropical bars.  It takes 5 separate bowls and about 2.5 hours baking the different parts and assembling them to make it happen.  It is a recipie from Shawn's Aunt Judy, and it is well worth the work provided you love macademia nuts, pineapple and coconut as much as I do.  

Gavin seemed to enjoy them and commented on the "nutty after taste".  When I asked him to rate them 1 being not so good and 10 being best dessert EVER.  He gave them a 5, then after seeing my face a 7.  When I asked him what dessert would hit a 10 on his scale.  He said "Marissa's cupcakes!  YUM!!"

Moldy bread experiment

Gavin jumps into the car today and announces "In class today, I peed on some bread!" Then he adds "for a science experiment."

My mind does a quick reference to what experiment could possibly be taking place where Gavin is allowed this latitude.  

"Did your teacher say that was okay?" I respond. 

He answers "Yes.  She said I could rub it anywhere on my body.  But I wanted to pee on it.  Not rub it on my arm like the girls."

 "Uhh, okay..." I say cautiously. "I remember when your sisters did that experiment."

"Yeah?  Did they get to rub bread on things?" He asks with interest.

"They sure did!" I respond remembering that this was the year Jocelyn determined to not use her hands in public ever again.  (We were at the grocery store and I asked Jocelyn to grab a box of cereal off the shelf and put it into the cart.  She went over to the box, lifted up her elbows and grabbed it maneuvering over and then plopped it into the cart.  When I asked what she was doing, she looked at me and said "I don't want to touch it.  I could get germs." Then she promptly took out her hand sanitizer and cleaned up!)

"So tell me Gavin, what did you rub your other piece of bread on?"

"I peed on it. Well not both of them.  I took a different piece...I know you're glad about that mom. He smiles awkwardly and then continues, "and then I rubbed it on all the places in the classroom.  Oh yeah, and in the sand on the playground!" He states with some exuberance. 

"That will be pretty cool to see the mold.  How exactly did you pee on the bread without being immodest?" I ask, imagining him in the corner of the classroom taking care of that.  

"Me and the other boys went to the bathroom and peed into the toilet and on the bread.  "

"Okay.... " I say trying to decide if the teacher could possibly know what the boys had done.  But she'd have to right.?? All these boys coming back front the bathroom with yellow bread?? 

(sigh)  We should really pay our teachers more! 

Zombie Apocalypse

"Mom" Gavin asks, "which would you rather have during a zombie apocalypse?  Arms or legs."  I look at him and smile.  These little boy conversations are so different from the little girl conversations I have had over the past 20 years.  

"Definitely legs.  That way I can run away."  I answer.  

Gavin furrows his brow in thought.  "Not me.  I want my arms and hands so I can shoot my gun."  

"Well I saw a show about a real lady who learned how to do everything with her feet.  Even brush her teeth." I add giving weight to my decision. "I could totally learn how to hold a gun in my toes". I nod and look him in the eye as though my logic is completely sound, and he should choose legs too. 

"You know, you could crawl with your arms.  That's what I am going to do." He remarks, trying to sway my decision. 

"Oh" I say trying to show some serious consideration.  "Maybe I should think about it some more."

Gavin jumps down from the chair and begins walking out of the room adding "Okay, you think about it and let me know if you want a gun." 

20 minutes of Reading

During the summer we encourage our kids to read 20 minutes each day.  We even have a weekly library day to help with the reading variety.

Sometimes we put on our swim suits, and get some sun while reading, other times its individual reading in your room or even a reading party in the family room.  (Party implies the addition of snacks)

Today I told Gavin to go get Tiffany and we would have a party in the family room. After notifying his sister, he went into my office to "make a sign".  Although not unusual for him to create a sign, I was interested to see what he wanted everyone to know during our reading time.  

Mine Craft Vocabulary

I call over to Gavin who is sitting at the kitchen table playing mine craft on the computer.  "Your screen time is over for the day bud."

"Ugh!" He says "You don't know how hard it is to play this game.  Do you even know what a mob is?"

"A mom?" I respond having heard him incorrectly. 

"No.  A mob." He says emphasizing the b.

"Oh, yeah I know what a mob is.  It is a group of angry people." I reply. 

"Mom!" He says slightly exasperated. "I didn't say m-o-m. I said M-O-B."

Math Quiz

Gavin told Shawn that "even during the summer we have to do reading and math."  Then Gavin promptly provided Shawn a math worksheet to complete.  

Father & Son

Gavin and Shawn attended the Father-son camping trip this past weekend.  Gavin had so much fun that first night, when he stopped moving in his sleeping bag, he was "out like a light".  His curious nature had him running from experience to experience.  A man there found, caught and skinned a snake.  Gavin was glued to the entire experience.  The man skinning the snake, even gave Gavin the tail--to show his mom.  (Thoughtful man....).  

When they returned from the adventure, Gavin showed it to me, and then promptly disappeared to my room.  I found it laying on my pillow--luckily the snake tail was in a plastic bag.

Periodically this week the tail shows up around my things....in my makeup drawer, on my computer desk.  Gavin thinks it is hilarious to "freak me out".

I have tried not reacting, hoping the fun of seeing my reaction will dissipate as the reaction is less exciting--and then that the desire to keep this little game going will dissipate as well.  So far that isn't working....sigh.  

At least I am getting more accustomed to seeing it lying around the house.  And truthfully seeing that happy 8-year-old smile creep across his face makes it all worth the grossness.....well as long as the tail remains in the bag!

Kudos to Shawn who knows the value of having a different experience for Gavin, even if it would be easier to take him to do something that Shawn enjoys doing.  Gavin got such a kick out of putting the top down on the Porsche and loading up the trunk with camping gear! What a great man and father Shawn is!

Mother's Day

It is a strange phenomenon with women and Mother's Day.  You'd think that celebrating womanhood/motherhood would be a wholly positive experience.  And mostly the celebrating of one's own mother is. However the idea of celebrating yourself as a mother, strikes fear/dread into most women's hearts.  If the truth were spoken, I would say that Mother's day is often anticipated with apprehension and dread, as one might "the Reaping ceremony" in the Hunger Games.  I know I have raised smart kids who are too respectful to say out loud what we are all thinking. "Well she seems nice now, but not 20 minutes ago she was screaming 'Get in the car! Change your shirt!' And adding the guilt trip of  'Seriously?  You're making your mother late to church on Mother's Day?''

When I was a child, I remember doing all I could to make this a positive day for my Mother. I knew that my mother was a little uncomfortable with being "celebrated" for the great mom that she was/is.  What I did not fully understand is the the pressure that each mom feels on this day. When I became a mother myself I began to understand a little better why that is.  For me, it has more to do with my personal assessment of my skills as a mother.   Mother's day has been a day where I take stock on how I measure up to the mom I wish I were--you know the one being portrayed at the pulpit during church.  

Family Home Evening: Baptism Preparation

In preparation for Gavin's upcoming baptism in June (I know, you're all breathing a sigh of relief that I am letting go of the whole baptism fiasco from December), we have been centering our FHE lessons on basic gospel topics--and in particular the questions that the Bishop will ask Gavin in his baptism interview.

Last week we had Gavin teach the lesson on The Plan of Salvation.  After about 45 minutes of preparation and discussion between the two of us, he presented the lesson and fielded questions from Shawn and Tiffany, solidifying the ideas in his mind.  I silently patted myself on the back.

This week Marissa is home from college, and we had Gavin do a short review of the Plan of Salvation--so Marissa could catch up--and then watched a video of the First Vision.

I should pause here and mention that I have never met a kid with more questions and curiosity than Gavin.  His mind is always thinking, reconciling, processing and making inferences. So it was no surprise when during the movie he interrupted with questions and comments.
"Why are they tearing down all the trees instead of buying wood at the store?"
"Do they not have electricity?  They would have to use candles."
"Is this going to take a long time?"
"Why are people singing? Is that part of what really happened?"
"Why are they playing music?  That is distracting!"
"Can I pop some popcorn?"

We quietly answered questions, and then settled that we'd watch until the end then ask any questions.  However at the culmination of the video, where Joseph Smith is praying in the grove, a light descends, and a voice says "Behold this is my beloved Son. Hear him."  I was surprised by Gavin's grunt of disgust and comment.  "What? Seriously?  After all this Heavenly Father came down and broke the veil?"  he asked me looking to me for confirmation of his assumption.

Not quite understanding the distasteful way he said it, I paused the video to answer. "Yes, Gavin.  Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph Smith to tell him that none of the churches were correct.  He asked in faith.  Just like the scriptures said to."

"So now can they appear to everyone?" he retorted.

I look at Shawn still not understanding why this is so frustrating to Gavin.  Shawn takes over. "Well, they can appear to anyone.  But usually they don't.  This was a very special circumstance, and since Joseph would be the first prophet in the latter-days it was very important."

Gavin asks again. "So anyone can see Heavenly Father?"

Shawn reiterates  "Yes, they have appeared to others in the scriptures.  Jesus appeared to the Nephites, and his disciples.  Whenever it is necessary both Heavenly Father and Jesus have the power to do that."

"Well that is just great" Gavin spits out.  "Now everyone can see them and the whole Plan of Salvation is RUINED."  He is now practically yelling.  "I fought so hard in the spirit world. That sucks!"

What?  I look at Shawn to see if he can identify where we have veered off the path.  He says gently "Gavin the plan of salvation is not ruined. Because Heavenly Father and Jesus appeared to Joseph we learned about the plan.  And we learned other things.  For example that Jesus and Heavenly Father are two separate beings.  Not one person like some religions believe."

Gavin persists "But the veil...where we forgot where we came from.  We were supposed to come here to see if we could choose the right even when we couldn't remember.  And now everyone remembers...."

Ah HA!  Our minds finally catch up with Gavin's.  Marissa, Tiffany, Shawn and I each take turns talking about how the first vision helped us come to know and understand the plan.  Still wary, but having more understanding, Gavin relented and agreed to family prayer.

After the prayer Gavin runs off to brush his teeth.
I look at Shawn. "Perhaps this is one reason we should teach these lessons in order."  

2nd Grade Homework

On Gavin's list of words to define

Adore, 

Ambling, 

Ardent.  

I knew the first two, but I have never heard the word ardent before.... Have you?  I guess I need to read more.... Looks like my second grader is about to lap me. 

BTW:

 ardent: enthusiastic or passionate.  

Now go and use it in a conversation, and impress all the first graders you know! 

Our Lives Are the Lessons If We Will Listen

The past few weeks I have had a few--very distinct--opportunities to visit with some women in my ward.  I have gotten to know them a little better, have gained a greater understanding of Heavenly Father's love for me and them, and have come home feeling so utterly blessed in my own life.  Blessed not only because I have gained greater understanding of the incredible life I was given, but also blessed with the beautiful testimonies, and strength that these women have so graciously shared with me.  

I am writing, I hope carefully, about these experiences, and I am going to share them with you.  My wish is that I will be able to convey some of their life experience to you, and be able to accurately record my impressions and lessons that I have learned from watching and listening to these women.  Their tragedy and their triumph translating into my own life lessons.

Gavin's Reading Evaluation

As part of the "end of level testing", Gavin was asked to evaluate his skills.


The best thing about my oral reading is......  and  Something I want to improve.....

This kid never fails to make me laugh!

Raising Good Missionaries

Our stake has a mission prep class that runs every Sunday evening. All of the Laurels and Priests(16-18 years old) in our stake are invited to attend.  (Perhaps this is church wide?)

As part of this class Shawn and I were invited to be "investigators" that the 16-18 year old could teach a prepared lesson to.

In our grouping for the evening, we had three different youth.  They each taught a discussion lesson out of Preach My Gospel, with their parent as their companion. All of them did well.  One in particular, did extremely well.

The one that seemed the most prepared, had prepared the lesson in advance.  He had taught it the week before in their Family Home Evening--with no notes, or manual.  He had memorized the scripture references that went with topic he taught us, and he sat forward in the chair looking us both in the eyes as he spoke.

I left the evening so very impressed with the way this young man had prepared, and I commented to Shawn that we have got to get our kids teaching FHE at least once a month, to get them used to teaching.  Then, once we have built confidence in that area, we need to begin inviting over other families in our ward to teach FHE lessons to.

Elder Holland counseled us that the homes are the first MTC that the future missionaries will participate in.  He also stressed that no longer will the missionaries be able to enter the MTC to learn how to teach, and to learn gospel principles.  Rather they must come prepared and ready to teach the gospel.

But It Was Calling To Me

I went in to help in Gavin's class again today.  Yesterday he had received a three for his behavior. Gavin can't have friends over if he gets less than a four, however we had previously arranged to have a friend over.   After a lengthy discussion and some begging, I approved the friend if he promised that today he would do extra well, and get a five.  

When I arrived in the class to help I asked him how the day was going.  He reassured me that he still had a five--pointing to it hanging on his desk.  By the time my helping hour was over, I noticed that he had lost a number, and a four hung in it's place.

"What happened? " I asked quietly.  I was surprised because I had been in the classroom the whole time and there was nothing that I had witnessed.

"Well, " He began to explain.  "During recess Alaina was hanging upside down on the monkey bars, and I walked by and tapped her R-E-A-L-L-Y.... L-I-G-H-T-L-Y on the head.  Alaina just told on me so my teacher took off a number."

"Oh, Gavin." I say with concern in my voice. "I thought you were going to try extra hard today."  

Gavin earnestly explained further.  "I was trying Mom.  But she was just hanging there..... and well... I just couldn't resist."  He looked up with his big, blue, repentant eyes. "It was like her head was calling out to me."

But Can I Ask Santa?

"Mom" quarried Gavin, "could Santa bring me anything I ask him to bring me?"

I answer carefully knowing he most likely has very specific intentions. "Santa brings good children anything they ask for that is not really, really, expensive-- like a car or house--and that is not dangerous. Why are you asking?"

"Ugh. That's what I thought." He responded. "I was hoping that he could bring me the flame thrower that you said was too dangerous for my robot." Then being consigned to that he added "I guess I am going to have to think of another way to get one."

"Humm" I agree.

During General Conference this past weekend his ears perked up during President Monson's story about when he was 8 and lit a match to clear the grass from a meadow.

 I am going to have to keep a close on on this little boy.

More Robot Plans

Gavin's blueprint

Another day focused on building a robot.  I am afraid we are probably going to be going to the hardware store soon to begin gathering supplies.

Wanting to encourage his creativity, and help the trip to the hardware store be less frustrating and costly, we told Gavin that all engineers start with a drawing, or idea, and then they draw up plans.
(That's true right?)

Here are both his rendering of the prototype and blueprints.

Raptor-flame Prototype

He challenged me to build a robot that could destroy his in a fight.
I told him if his robot would spare mine, in the duel, it might share some of its cookies with him.

Mom's Robot Destroyer & Cookie Maker

***You might want to start thinking about your own robot--for the inevitable battle.

Battle Bots

I am not sure where Gavin saw battle robots, but all extra time these days is spent pondering how he can create one.

What I Know About Denmark

This year in school Gavin's class has been talking about different countries around the world.  Since the world is a topic Shawn enjoys, culture, people and nationalities are often discussed in our home.

So it was no surprise when Gavin was telling others in the carpool what he knew. 

"In Denmark it is dark when they wake up.  So they don't even know if it is day or night.
And they have really hard cookies that don't have any sugar in them."

Yeah, we may need to talk about Denmark again.

My Church, or Yours?

For the past year, Shawn has served on the High Council and attends another ward in our stake, instead of attending church with us, in our ward.  Since this began, Shawn and I have teased back and forth about him attending "his church"  and me attending mine.  This past Sunday I realized that our "clever banter", has been confusing Gavin.

Gavin approached me first thing to ask me his regular Sunday morning question.

"Do I HAVE to go to church today?" 

"Yes" I respond as usual.  "Guess what though?" I say to Gavin.  "Daddy will be coming with us, because it is ward conference today and all the High Council men and Stake leaders attend our ward.."

"What?" asks Gavin quizzically.  "But I wanted to go with Daddy to his church. Not have him come to yours." responds Gavin

I cringe a little realizing my mistake, and noting the pronouns in his sentence.

"Well, Daddy's church is our church, it is just at a different time."  I try to explain. "Because all the people who want to go to our church can't fit into the building at the same time, they have assigned each family a group and a time for each group.  The groups are called wards."  Thinking I have clarified the situation, I move into the other room.

Gavin follows asking "Well, Dad is in our family, and he doesn't go at our time."

Oh yeah, there is that.  I consider. This explanation is going to get more complicated.  I really don't want to resort to the "because that is the way it is" or "because I said so."  I sigh.

As though on cue, in steps Shawn from his early meeting.  Gavin quickly brings him up to speed on the issue of who's ward he wants to attend.

Shawn smiles at me, grabs a pencil and paper, and calls Gavin to the counter to diagram the organization of the church.  Explaining how people serve in callings to help keep the church organized and running.

As Shawn finishes he looks at me as though to say "And that is how it is done." and smirks.

Then Gavin, studying the paper, says "Okay.....but Dad?  Can I go with you to your church today?"

Dairy

We jumped into the car, in a hurry this morning, trying to make it on time to Tiffany's swim meet. I look up to see Gavin precariously carrying a full cup of liquid. As he gingerly slides into the back seat his arm bumps and some white liquid falls to the carpet.

"Nope" I say taking the very full cup of milk out of his hands."no milk in the car. If you spill it the car will smell bad for weeks."

"Ugh..." He complains. "I'm thirsty."

Shawn pulls away and we begin making some progress towards the pool. I open my yogurt, wanting to eat something quickly before we go into the meet. (I have just returned from a 14 mile run and we've been in such a hurry I have not had a chance to eat yet.)

"Wait a minute" I hear from the back seat. "Why can you have dairy in the car but I can't?"

Shawn and I look at each other. Pretty smart kid. How do I argue with that?

"Well, your probably right Gavin". I say respectfully. "This would probably make the car stink if I spilt it. I guess we shouldn't have any dairy in the car."

He folds his arms in self awareness.  Since when did the 8 year old start making the rules, I think to myself as I take big, quick bites

What is that?

Shawn took me out to lunch at Olive Garden. While we were sitting, waiting for our disk to light up and tell us it was our turn to be seated, I looked over at this vent. I almost jumped when I saw it. I swear it looked to me like a little mouse looking out at me with his tail curled around. Ratatouille-like.

Shawn tells me I have a wild imagination-- but you can see it too?? Right??

Gratitude on Valentine's Day

Life ebs and flows.  It is interesting to look over the course of your life and see the things that you thought mattered so much when you were younger, don't seem to be quite as big of a deal now. And then other things that weren't such a big deal before are now paramount.

Last week I was waiting to have my oil changed at a place we have been going for the last 18 years.  It is a small garage, run by family.  They do good quality work.  It reminds me quite a bit of going with my dad to Ray's -- a repair shop in Denver.  The workers are humble, fair and friendly, they don't decorate their shop--they work on cars.  The waiting area has a small heater to keep the clientele warm, and is functional --probably "decorated" about 30 years ago.  Now the room is worn and dirty albeit adequate for the occasional waiting client.

As I sat and chatted with one of the workers that we have known for years, a lady dressed in an over-sized mismatched t-shirt, and ripped ill fitting jeans came into the shop, announcing that she finally had some money to help pay off her bill. (Considering it was 30 degrees outside, she was under dressed for comfort.) The owner came from the backroom, totaled what seemed like 5-6 invoices, and showed her the total.  She didn't look surprised, but saddened.  She handed him a wad of cash and admitted she didn't have enough and would have to come back when she got paid again.  Before she could say another word the owner said "Oh I forgot to give you the discount for our regulars."  Promptly discounting her bill and giving her back $20, he pronounced "That settles everything. Thanks for your business."

My first thought was "wait a minute!  I come here all the time, with every car we have--for the last 18 years!  I have never heard of the "regular discount".  But as she waved goodbye and expressed her gratitude,  I glanced at the owner who quietly marked the bills and disappeared again into the back room.  Wait.  I think as it begins to dawn on me.  There is no regular discount.  He just took a loss to help that lady.

As I have processed this experience over the past week, I have become so grateful for the life and challenges I have been given.  No life is without them.

There Was An Old Lady, By Gavin

As a writing assignment Gavin had to fill in the blanks in the traditional story about the old lady who swallowed a fly. It started out normally enough. (Words that Gavin inserted into the blanks are bolded.)

There was an old giant who swallowed a desk. I don't know why he swallowed a desk perhaps he'll rest.

I know an old giant who swallowed a Jasmine (girl that sits next to Gavin and often bothers him). He swallowed the Jasmine to eat the desk. I don't know why he swallowed the desk, I guess he'll rest.

I know an old giant who swallowed a sharpener to help the Jasmine write on the desk. I don't know why he swallowed a desk, I guess he'll rest.

I know an old giant who swallowed a pencil, to sharpen and write on the desk, perhaps he'll rest.

.....and the story continues pretty normally.

After his teacher reads the story there is a note highlighting Jasmine's name.  "Gavin this is not okay."

Gavin then re-does the assignment.  He crosses out Jasmine's name and inserts Gavin in the blanks where her name was.

When I ask him about it he says "Yeah, my teacher didn't like it.  But I thought it would be cool to be in the stomach of a giant, and of course I would get out before he dies."

 "Really."  I respond. "How would you do that?"

"Yeah, you see, the pencil is actually a weapon. If you touch the little hanging thing in the back of the giants mouth, he would automatically throw me back up."

Wisdom from the Bleachers of a Pool

Shawn and I are sitting at a swim meet in the uncomfortable and loud pool.  While we wait for Tiffany's event to start, we are chatting about different things that are going on.  We stumble upon the subject of a friend that has a pet that she has to give away because her lease prohibits animals.
    
Shawn looks at me, judging my current temperament, than cautiously evokes this jem of wisdom. "Pets are like jewelry.  You never get what you paid for them, and you can never get rid of them."

Wait.  What?  Is this about Pets?  or my jewelry?  

"Hey!" I say the implications dawning on me, "I knew you didn't like pets, but why don't you like my jewelry?"

Cloudy With a Chance of Seals

Gavin brought home a story that he wrote at school today.  I laughed at the ending, and loved the moral of the story. I am attaching the image of the paper, however it took a little deciphering for me.  I should probably add that Gavin has been asking Shawn and I if, since he has taken such good care of his stuffed seal, he could get a "real seal" for a pet.  I have tried to explain that seals can't be pets because they need the ocean--not a house--and that it would be nearly impossible to feed them.  Enjoy. 

" Cloudy with a Chance of Seals"

by: Gavin

"Onec ther was a town caled Seal town wear the kids ho(who) want seals, get seals from the sky.  when they fall down to the ground they went in peaples houses.  Thes seals stayed in ther.  And they had to take care of them.  So they did.  and when the seals were hungry they just went and got some.  and when they are mad they brak stuff.  So they tri to keep them happy.

the End

Lance Armstrong

While I was in Dallas at the Gift Show, Shawn saw a promotional spot for Oprah's interview with Lance Armstrong and recorded it for me to view upon my return. Of course we were hearing bits and pieces of the interview highlighted on the news, and comments on people's Facebook/twitter posts referring to the scandal  He lied--continually--cheated, sued people who told the truth and bullied people into submission.  So why, I wondered, was I saddened that most of the comments were unusually cruel, and mean.  It seemed to me that perhaps people assumed that Lance having done those things, entitled them to mock, act poorly and say mean things.

Having made my own mistakes, perhaps I am more willing to forgive someone who has, not only made their own mistakes, but also has them played out for all the world to discuss and debate.  One could argue that Lance put himself in the spotlight by the life he chose to live, and thereby deserves his public flogging as well as the praise he received   I ask you to consider this... Is

That Can't Be..Or Maybe it Can

When I was in my early twenties I would hear impossible stories and roll my eyes.

One I recall was about a woman who went to the emergency room because of stomach pain and discovered that it wasn't stomach pain.  She was 9 months pregnant and giving birth. It was utterly ridiculous. Any woman--even a non educated one--would know she was pregnant before she was nine months along.  Even if she didn't get morning sickness, she would recognize when she had sex, her periods stopped and her belly moved by its self.  I am not wrong here I thought defiantly.  How could a woman not know that she was pregnant?  Idiots, we are talking about idiots, I complained very vocally about it.

In my late thirties came my opportunity to claim my place--as one of the idiots.  I discovered I was pregnant with Gavin four and a half months into my pregnancy.  I had no inkling of this knowledge until the actual discovery of it.  What finally tipped me off?  I was running one morning around the track, and just couldn't push myself to hit the split times. When I jogged to recover between the splits, my heart rate returned to normal and I felt good.  However during the splits my energy plummeted.  After my third failed attempt at the split time I said to my friend "It feels like I am dragging another person around with me."  Her comment back to me?  "Have you considered that maybe you are?"

What?  No, I thought. This couldn't be.  I reasoned with my friend.  For starters I was taking the pill--like clock work.  Add to that my lack of a menstrual period was perfectly explained by the intense physical training I had been doing in preparation for the upcoming marathon. And for the crowning reason that this could not be so, I threw up every morning during the first three months of pregnancy, for all three of my previous pregnancies, and I had not been nauseous at all.

And yet, I was, in fact, pregnant.  (I can now say it was the best surprise I have ever received! And that God has a plan, even if he doesn't let you in on it.)

It was painfully obvious to me at the time that not only should I never say never to avoid being the idiot, but also,

Party Etiquette

I need your help.  I simply don't have a lot of experience with parties, or with appropriate etiquette for them.  Let me explain what I am talking about, and then I hope you'll take a minute and tell me what you think we should do in the future.

Usually we alternate years, as partners to be in charge of the office Christmas party.  Because of all we had going on in December, Shawn's law partner and his wife, very kindly offered to be in charge of the office Christmas party--even though they had been in charge the previous year. I was very grateful.

For the past 5 years, the party has been held at the new law office, been a catered dinner in the conference room, and we--as the partners--have personally paid for the dinner, as well as donated gifts (about $400) for a white elephant gift exchange.  (This is in addition to the Christmas bonuses that employees receive based on the number of years they have been with the firm.)

This year it worked better for our partner, who was in charge of the event, to hold it on a night that Shawn "helps" Santa. They decided to have the party early--dinner was scheduled at 6:00pm--so that there would be no conflict with the appearance at 8:30pm.  The party was held at their beautiful new home, and they cooked the dinner themselves--instead of having it catered.  An extremely generous gesture.  When we asked what we could do to help we were told not to bring anything and to "just come and enjoy".

When we arrived at 6:05pm no one else was there.

Pinewood Derby 2013

Being how Gavin has been a cub scout for less than a month, and we have not had a boy to participate in the Pinewood Derby before, I was a little concerned.  If you haven't recognized it in previous posts, I will put it plainly, Gavin has a competitive streak. (I wonder where he gets it?)  And in our ward/troop we have a couple of the most competitive fathers boys that I know.

Carpool Fodder

I know you already know I think driving the carpool is one of the most comical things I do.

I laugh, inquire into 8 year old minds, and discover that life is so much simpler than I often make it.

Today however, it seemed that possibly life was a little more complicated than I had assumed.


Gavin turns to one of the boys in the carpool as he steps out of the car.

"Hey Matt.  Tomorrow will you ask your mom if we can get together and change the world?" (When you put it that way how could I or Matt's mom say no.)

"Well," responds Matt reluctantly.  "I can ask her but I am not done with my drawings."

"Okay" concedes Gavin. "When you are done with the drawings ask your mom."

"Alright." the boy says as he shuts the car door. "See you tomorrow."

I look quizzically at Gavin and his slightly frustrated expression.  He responds to my look.

"Matt is sure taking a long time to draw up the plans.  He and I are going to build an arc reactor that will change the world."

Engagement Pictures

As promised, here are some of the pictures of Jocelyn and Alec that I had the opportunity to take this past October.  It was really fun seeing their personalities, and getting see how they interact together as a couple.  We have known Alec for years, as a friend and fellow classmate, however getting to see him as a more mature, returned missionary, and companion to our Jocelyn was entirely different.

Taking the Plunge!

Jocelyn couldn't stop laughing.

Alec was really patient with my amateur photography abilities, of course Jocelyn was already familiar with my "one more" meant ten philosophy.

This one is my favorite.  

I really love this picture.  We had been taking pictures for a while, and they were chatting as I set up my camera to get a different shot.  I took the picture mid conversation.  One of my favorite things about this picture is seeing Alec get enjoyment out of making Jocelyn laugh.  It reminds me of something that President Hinckley said;

Elementary School Jokes

Went to lunch with Gavin today. The second graders were funny and cute as usual.
They were telling jokes--- jokes that I remember telling when I was in grade school.

"Are you P.T.? " one child asks me.
"Oh, I know this joke." I tell him.  "I don't want to answer.  Either way is not good for me." I consult with Gavin.

"Mom, say you are PT, that is the best one." Gavin instructs, sweetly watching my face to make sure I am not injured by the response.

Then a similar question, with a 2000 year twist.

"Are you my BFF?"

I think I am pretty sure what that means in texting, but you never know what the 2nd grade twist will be.
So that you are not caught unaware yourself, I will give you the cheats that Gavin whispered into my ear.

"If you say yes you're a buffalo fire fighter or a big fat friend.  If you say no.....well I guess your not the best friend forever.  Go with not the best friend, mom.  It is mean, but you can still be a good friend"

Overjoyed

I love it when one of my favorite artists releases a new album.  Matchbox 20/Rob Thomas-- I would pay real, 2013 concert prices to go see them in concert.  Their new album is great; "Overjoyed", "Parade", and "Put Your Hands Up" are some of my favorites.

And Enrique!  Have you heard his new songs? (at least new to me)  "Somebody's Me", "The Way You Touch Me" and "Finally Found You".  Great music.

Thanks to Shawn for screening and updating my song lists.  (And as an added bonus--we can listen to something other than The Highway when I choose the music!)

Shawn taught me another great time saving trick.  Use the SoundHound app to identify songs that you like when you hear them.  Then you can just go to the history to see the list of songs that you want to download later when you are at your computer.

Never Enough Time

"Hey."  I say to Gavin. "Aunt Randi is coming tonight.  I need you to pick up your legos so the family room will be clean."
"What?" replies Gavin with an excited voice.  "Is Uncle Kevin coming too?"
"Yep." I respond, knowing he is pleased to be seeing the architect of his favorite game.
Gavin let's out a whoop. "This is awesome.  Tell him Minecraft is on me!"

An hour or so later the doorbell rings, Gavin runs to open it.
"Hi!" says Gavin, pushing past Randi with two suitcases.  Then grabbing Kevin's suitcase he adds, "Here Uncle Kevin, let me help you with that!"
Kevin laughs at the attention, and scoots into the foyer with Gavin lugging his bag.
"Can I have a hug Gavin?" asks Randi noticing that Gavin's focus is completely on Kevin.
""Sure" Gavin responds giving her a quick hug before hugging Kevin again and then launching into some specifics about the game of Minecraft.
After a couple minutes of talking, Gavin is disappointed to discover they will only be staying one night, and there won't be time for playing Minecraft before bed.  He slinks off to brush his teeth as the conversation takes a twist another direction.

The next morning before school, he comes out of his room dressed in sweats and a t-shirt--not school clothes.
"Can I please stay home today?" he pleads with me.
"Nope.  You have to go to school that's how you become smarter!"  When the whining ensues I ask "Why do you want to stay home today?"
Gavin explains. "Uncle Kevin leaving this morning and we didn't have a chance to play Minecraft."

Reading the News

Gavin brought the paper into me this morning with the question "Can we adopt him mom?"  Gavin and I have the same soft heart. (sigh)

He and I read the article together and talked about this dog, Oakley, and how we-- as children of God--have the responsibility to care for animals as well as humans. Then we discussed the possibility that others have already adopted Oakley-- since this paper is a few days old.

Then, honestly, I deflected. (Squirrel)  I just can't imagine taking on one more thing right now.

Little Wonders

Shawn found me a picture!

I am looking forward to having some time to write a post about the past couple weeks and the wonderful experience of going with my daughter to the temple.  (We paid a professional photographer to take pictures, I didn't even bother bringing my camera.  So sadly I have no pictures of the occasion for 3-4 weeks.)

Overall it was an incredible, wonderful experience.  Seeing Jocelyn with the man she loves, and watching them --blissfully unaware of the magnitude of this choice--taking the biggest step of their lives.  This is not to say that I don't agree with Jocelyn's choice in husband--rather the contrary.  I love and admire Alec--both in the choices he has made thus far in his life and in the way that he loves, laughs with and cares for my daughter.  He has a testimony of the gospel, is a returned missionary, is kind to Gavin and my other daughters, respects Shawn and I and comes from an incredible, loving family himself.

However I understand from my own previous naivety, how this choice--eternal marriage--affects every other choice in your life after it.  It is a really big, eternal, far reaching decision.  

It was wonderful, joyous, and a little melancholy being the mother of the bride, knowing that Jocelyn and Alec are off on their own life adventure, and that the majority of my parenting of her is finished.  

It was a  rich, rewarding experience to see my daughter who has made correct decisions all her life-- to follow the prophet's council, not date until she is 16, dress modestly, and listen to the Holy Ghost-- walk into the temple on Saturday morning.  She was glowing, her eyes bright, and her spirit brimming with happiness.  On the way out to greet their waiting guests after the sealing, she couldn't contain her excitement, and skipped down the hallway--the word giddy seemed to fit the new couple precisely.

There were several amusing and slightly irreverent moments.  Including coming back into the locker room of the temple-- fresh from the sealing--to find the alarm on my phone ringing from the locker. (ahh the sound override of my alarm program and I have a love/hate relationship.)  The alarm music playing one of my favorite songs as I tore into my locker and temple bag trying to stop the music.

The hardest part is over, 

Let it in,

Let your clarity define you 

In the end

We will only just remember how it feels

Our lives are made

from these small hours,

These twists and turns of fate,

Time falls away,

But these small hours,

Still remain.

Right now I am focusing on cleaning up from guests and festivities, returning items borrowed for the reception, and taking down Christmas decorations.  

Maybe next week I will have time to share a couple of specific experiences.  Including what I think about preparing your child to go to the temple, the an incredible gift it is to be surrounded by family, the role of the mother of the bride as I see it looking back, and a few questions about party etiquette from Christmas and wedding experiences.

But for now we bask in the success of getting through the past couple months, and seeing our daughter and new son-in-law (or as Gavin introduces him "My brother") make that wonderful/exciting transition from single to married, befitting the song Little Wonders.