Jocelyn Graduates from College!!

Congratulations on going the distance in your education Jocelyn, and graduating from one of the finest Universities in the World!! 

College prepares you in a a micro-environment for the macro- world.  Lessons about learning, adapting, making decisions, and working with people.  It is so important for your growth, your understanding of who you are in the world, and for your willingness to see and accept more than you imagined was true.

Special thanks to Alec for getting Jocelyn to class, long before he made the eternal commitment to be her husband.  It is amazing how many times life circles back to choices and decisions you made beforehand.

The Team that made it all happen.

Kids together for the big event--(Marissa in cell phone)

Proud Parents

Grandma Linda came too!

Fun morning taking photos

Father and Daughter

Cause "Rock On" goes with everything

3 generations stand by the memorial to Eddie Kimball

Jocelyn planned a wonderful party.

Panini bar was a hit!

Matt and Kristi and Family came to celebrate too!

We're so proud of you Jocelyn!  Now on to the next big adventure.

Jocelyn's "Say Yes To The Dress" with the Runyan Girls

Thanks Aunt Becky for taking the picture!

We met in Provo this past Saturday for a "Say YES to the Dress" event.  

The Audience Awaits!

Thanks to her amazing Aunts,Kristi, Blanca, Randi & Becky we had a wonderful time trying on dresses and spending time together.  

I can't show a picture of her in the amazing dress that she chose, but trust me she looks like the beautiful, radiant, princess that we have always known her to be.  

When Jocelyn put "the dress" on, we all knew it was the one for her.

Jocelyn & Amanda--don't worry
this isn't the dress!

Jocelyn checking in at David's Bridal with
Aunt Blanca & Lexie

Wedding Advice

At life-transitioning moments almost everyone has bits of wisdom they want to impart.  Shawn and I had 3 different receptions (well an open house in Salt Lake, and a reception in Evergreen and in Wyoming.) I remember many people-- that I didn't know-- telling me what they thought was the "key to a good marriage."  "Don't go to bed angry." "Always tell each other everything." "Get separate bank accounts", and the list goes on and on.

I remember braiding Jocelyn's wet hair after her baptism, and listening to Shawn's mom give Jocelyn some advice.  "You're all clean now.  Every bad thing you have ever done is now washed away. You're perfect at this moment.  You have to be careful now not to put stains on your beautiful white dress, by making bad choices."  As I listened, I watched Jocelyn look down at the beautiful white satin dress that her Grandma Linda had made her.  I could see her making the connections between stain and sin in her mind.  I wondered if we were overwhelming her, or if that was the perfect visual for my hand-sanitizing, germophobic daughter to relate to.  (We talked later about the sacrament, how we didn't have to be perfect and how we could correct mistakes that we would make.)

Giving advice to engaged couples, is not only common, but in some ways has become expected. Being on the parenting end, instead of the receiving end of the advice, it is interesting to listen to the advice that people give, and weigh it against my own experience.  It can be very enlightening to listen to their advice, often giving a glimpse into their own relationship.

Alec and Jocelyn captured some sound advice from Gavin. (The video could possibly be a little telling about his relationships.)

Now it is your turn.  What is your best advice to couples getting married? 

Our Jocelyn is Getting Married!

 Jocelyn and Alec have officially set the wedding date for December 29, 2012, in the Saint George Temple.  We are very excited for the two of them!

Alec found a way to ask Jocelyn to marry him in a romantic, surprising way--even though she knew he would be asking her.  (I will allow Jocelyn the privilege of telling that story herself.)

It is fun to have Alec around, and to see how happy the two of them are together.  And Gavin has already started bragging about having a brother.  :)

Jocelyn Brave

This is a great picture of Jocelyn all dressed up for the Disney Brave premiere. 

  While I was in Provo a couple weeks ago I had the chance to spend more time with Jocelyn than I had in quite a while. It was really fun to be with her.  She has such a fun, flexible easy-to-laugh personality.  It makes hanging around with her, no matter what you are doing, fun.  She is thoroughly enjoying the BYU experience, and seeing her there brought back memories of her trying to choose a college three years ago.

She had worked her entire high school career to be able to have the choice of where she wanted to attend college.  When she was accepted at BYU, I thought it was a no-brainer, but she wasn't quite sure that is where she wanted to go. I'll admit it was very difficult for me to stand back and let her pray about her decision with the freedom to choose her own college.  When she came back with the decision to go to SUU, I wanted to revoke her free agency and force her to go to BYU--which I deemed was the best college for her.  I reasoned with Shawn and God that perhaps she wasn't quite ready to make the decision and still needed me to tell her where to go.  However, reasoning by Shawn and a clear prompting by the spirit had me relenting and paying deposits at SUU.  When January rolled around we took her on the "college tour" and fully invested in her going to SUU in the fall.  (Which I found out is a really fantastic college, by the way.)

When she came to Shawn and I a few weeks later saying she was feeling uneasy and wanted to pray about it again if it wasn't too late, I was a little surprised.  After a father's blessing, prayer and fasting on her part, she  came to the decision that Heavenly Father wanted her to go to BYU, even if she didn't want to go there.

It took quite a bit of bravery and courage to redirect herself and to change her plans for the fall.  While I was happy she was going to the college I would have chosen for her, I was more grateful and so very proud of the way that she sought the promptings of her Heavenly Father and followed what she knew was right for her.

She is responsible, kind and generous.  I am very proud of the woman she is becoming.  Thank you Jocelyn for letting me still be a part of your wonderful life adventure.

Best Lego Space Ship

For FHE Shawn and Gavin conspired together for a Gavin-inspired family activity.  Since Lego building is one of Gavin's very favorite activities, they decided to have a contest to build the best space ship.

While giving Jocelyn, Tiffany and I the rules for the contest, Gavin added that this would only be the first of four contests.  When Shawn insisted that there was only one contest for FHE, Gavin added quietly that "well yes, but there are different levels within the contest".  Shawn grinned broadly at the boy who thought he could out think and maneuver his dad at age 7.  Then insisted that there would only be one contest with one level, but 5 different prizes.

We dumped out all the Legos onto the small table in the family room and set the timer for 10 minutes.  When the 2 minute warning went off  surprisingly we all wanted an additional 5 minutes of building time.  The finished products were really fun.  Not surprisingly the ships also reflected some of each of the builder's personality.

Here are the finished "space ships"

Tiffany's creation won "Most Coolest"

Tiffany's creation included landing gear, aerodynamic curves, buttons for specific functions and other realistic aspects to her designs.

Mine won "Most Power Generators" 

My design had multiple power inducing engine designs, (Gavin's favorite feature), and the ship was controlled by thought.

Jocelyn's won "Most Creative"

Jocelyn's ship had an entire story. A dying planet, shipwrecked aliens all working together for the hope of a future for all Aliens, and of course a plant that was being transported to the future planet in a Wal-e fashion.

Shawn's won "Funniest"

Shawn's ship had a monkey with a "rock on" hand symbol, had wings and guns that shot from all angles and was equipped with a super-banana peel in case of dyer circumstances.

What did Gavin's ship look like you ask?  Well.... his creation won "Best Pet".  Yeah, after all the discussion about it being a "space ship building contest", he decided to create a pet instead.  He said in response "I just decided that would be more different."

Spelling Words

Jocelyn has finished her winter semester finals and arrived early this morning.  She was in the kitchen helping Gavin with his spelling words this afternoon.

"The word is took, Gavin.  Marissa wanted to go gas up her car.  So she invited her friend and took him with her."

I, laughing in the other room, call out.  "Ummm....Jocelyn? He is in first grade. Try and work the spelling word into the first sentence of your essay."

Our Jocelyn!

One Day Old

Happy Birthday Jocelyn.  The day you were born was such a great day.  It has been so incredible watching you grow, change and mature. You changed my life forever!  I feel so blessed to be your mom.  I love you so much!

2011

Halloween 3 yrs old

Senior Picture 

Christmas play-- Elf 11 yrs old

Rachel your first doll--before the accident.

High School!

Baptism Day with Grandpa Terry & Granddad 

First Disneyland trip 5yrs old

Granddad Med School Graduation--7 yrs old

4 years old

Daddy and you--3 yrs old

Halloween 6 yrs old

4 yrs old

Mommy's College Graduation 2 yrs old

First day of Preschool 4 yrs old

  I feel so blessed to be your mom.  Happy Birthday Jocelyn!

Sacrament Meeting -- Part Two

(As promised here is the second part of Shawn's first high council speaking assignment.)

Jocelyn leans over to me and says "Dad looks very serious."
I look up at him sitting on the stand, next to the returned missionary who will be speaking with him today, and observe his face.  Shawn does look serious.  Over the past 23 years I have come to know this "look" as his look of concentration.  He does it before he argues in court, gives continuing legal education classes, teaches Sunday school or speaks in church.

I turn to Jocelyn and say.  "Maybe we should try and make him smile."
She and I begin trying to catch his eye and get him to smile.  Of course those of you who know me and my girls, probably know already that this turns into a small, yet eager, competition to see who can get him to smile first.  All while we are singing the rest hymn.

Now, you'd think to yourself, this is a great opportunity for the Farris girls to feel and enjoy the spirit without having to worry about Gavin disturbing others.  Alas, you'd be wrong.  When my girls and I get together, it is pure fun.  And the fact that everyone is older, and quick witted, means there is always a lot of laughter involved.  (Reminds me of hanging around with my sisters and brothers.)

Shawn finally looks up and gives me half a smile.  (I win!).  Then he slowly moves his hand up his lapel, and ever so slightly gives the "Farris gang symbol".  Only I catch it.

I lean into Jocelyn and say "Did you see dad give the gang sign?"
"What? No!"  She looks up and Shawn does it again.
Tiffany slides her hand down her hair...with the appropriate hand spacing to give the sign back.  Shawn smirks.  Now the entire bench is shaking as the girls struggle to control their laughter.

(Wondering what the Farris gang symbol is?  Stay tuned to further blog posts!)

Sacrament Meeting--Part One

Shawn had his first opportunity to speak in sacrament meeting as a high counselor today.  Jocelyn was in town for the President's Day weekend.  His assignment was for the 6th ward which meets in our building directly after our ward.   We decided to go to our own ward for sacrament meeting, and Sunday school, then skip our 3rd hour and go to the 6th wards sacrament meeting.  (Leaving Gavin in the last hour of Primary of our own ward.)

The girls and I go in and find a soft seat in the middle towards the front.  Jocelyn is sitting next to me, then Marissa and Tiffany on the end.  I see these beautiful older girls sitting next to me and take a long, slow, breath.  It seems like the time has passed so quickly.  I am amazed at the simple joy that it gives me to see them all sitting next to me, laughing, commenting, and interacting with one another--just as they did 10 years ago.  I bask in the moment as the meeting starts.  Sigh...

The sacrament begins and I look over and Rissa has her cell phone out and is reading something.  This is not an approved sacrament meeting activity for our family, however I consider, this is our second sacrament meeting of the day.  Perhaps she is reading an Ensign article, or some scriptures.?  (Hey! It could happen!)

I lean to Jocelyn and say "What is she reading?"  

Jocelyn looks over, then turns back to me.  "Your blog." 

"Really?" I say flattered.  I observe her body shaking as she is trying to stifle her laughter.  I sigh, knowing I have to tell her to stop.    

Jocelyn observes my satisfaction in hearing she is reading my blog, and decides to translate for me.  

"Mom says if you are going to read, you should at least comment."

Mantra "Independant and Strong"

For the first year that Jocelyn was gone to college I obsessed and worried about how she was doing. Was she making friends?  Did her teachers like her?  Was she able to communicate with her dorm mom?  Her roommates?   I couldn't email her teachers, fix her roommate issues, or find her good friends.  My desire to be involved and to assist her in solving her problems was more appropriate for a high school student --not a college student.  Shawn had to remind me that this was her opportunity to do things on her own, make her own mistakes and learn lessons from her own trial and error experiences.  My desire to take over didn't help her become the independent and strong woman that we knew she could be.

When she went to Florida and did an internship with Disney World the summer after her freshman year at college, circumstances made it impossible for me accompany her and get set up for the summer.  I realized, from my nail biting vantage point, that she is far more capable and strong then I allowed her to be when I step in and "help".

So now whenever I have the urge to dive in and fix/rescue I repeat the mantra "Independent and Strong".  It helps me remember that she is that, and I want to facilitate it by allowing her to rescue herself.

Another BYU Convert!

So, as I knew I would, I really miss Jocelyn. It is really strange not to have her around. She has left little notes in various places and I love finding them at random times and thinking of her.

As many of you know, last year this time her heart was set on attending Southern Utah University. In fact when anyone talked positively about BYU there was some eye rolling and quiet murmurs of students "looking for their eternal mate", instead getting an education.

No amount of encouragement, logic, reference to ancestors or begging could sway her.

(I have previously shared the reversal of her decision before so I won't bore you with the details about her "change of heart" again.)

I have been a little worried that despite the BYU hype and the divine inspiration, she might not find the love of the Y as we all previously did.

This morning I logged onto Facebook and saw this picture of her.

I guess a picture really is worth a thousand words.

Jocelyn off to BYU!!

We took Jocelyn to BYU yesterday. Shawn rode up in the car with her and Gdog and I in the heavily loaded "Blue" following behind. (Gdog has named all our cars. The van is named "blue", the Porsche is "Speedy" and Jocelyn's car is "Fireball") It was a bitter sweet moment when we drove into Utah Valley and saw the Y on the mountain. It reminded me of driving into town 20+ years ago with all my fears hopes and dreams wrapped into one young excited girl.
It also reminded me of wonderful days with Jocelyn living at home with us. She was a beautiful, calm baby. She was an inquisitive, patient and caring little girl. She was a preteen with her own sense of self, determination and creativity. She was an amazing teen, studious, organized, inclusive, competitive and dependable. She is becoming an incredible adult, doing fun things, meeting unique people and forming her perspective of the world and finding her own place in it. We are so blessed to be her family.

Jocelyn had our arrival and list of tasks well planned. We first went to get her student ID. Because we were early here...others were checking into the dorms first...there was relatively no line. Then off to the bookstore. (We had prepaid online for her books, from a list generated by the computer from her class registration.) We went to the counter, Jocelyn swiped her ID and they produced a small white box with all but 2 of her class books. (One was missing because there were no more used books and we hadn't checked the "substitute" box, and the other a syllabus that had just arrived that morning.) We went to a bank of 12 computers, Jocelyn typed in her user ID and password and it automatically printed her book list and location in the bookstore. A three minute walk in the bookstore to collect the 2 items, and a 30 second wait in line and we were done here too.
Then off to the dorms. There were resident assistants there to answer questions (that Jocelyn commented you could have read on the website), give information, and keys. We proceeded to the 3rd floor, to check out her room. Her bed previously assigned and her roommate already moved in, the path was clear to begin moving Jocelyn's 20 boxes. Shawn and I spent the next 30 minutes herding Gdog and carrying all the boxes up the 3 flights of stairs and half-way down the hall to her room. Jocelyn unpacked, and unpacked and unpacked. We made the bed, created a shopping list and headed towards the Commons (formerly known as the Cannon Center) for lunch.

BYU gives a free meal to parents this day so we paid the $2 for Gdog and ventured into the brand new retro themed eating area. This was a far cry from the cafeteria that I knew as a freshman. There are 3 themed areas that prepare a rotating--very fresh-- menu. Also a dessert bar, salad bar and burrito/wrap bar. Jocelyn found a veggie wrap, Shawn an international shish-k-bob and rice, and I ate a lettuce wrap and a salad. Gdog ate fresh fruit. (No surprise there!!) Jocelyn commented that she will love eating here. The strangest discovery was that they do not serve breakfast on Sunday morning. First meal is lunch at 12 noon.....I wonder if they expect all the kids to fast every Sunday morning??

After lunch Shawn and Gdog headed to get an ethernet cable and Jocelyn and I went on a timed walk from her dorm room to her Chemistry class in the MARB building....for your information it takes 12 minutes at a good walking pace. :) We learned that the "MARB" is the Thomas Martin building....I guess MARB is short for Martin Building?? (Good to know before the first day of classes.)

Then we dropped Jocelyn off at her first meeting for Freshman Academy and went off to our own meeting. Afterward we picked her up and went out to Training Table for dinner---cheese fries...YUMMY!!! Then to Wal-mart for the last of the room supplies.

On the way back into the dorms we passed Brenna...Jocelyn's really cute roommate and I took a picture. (She's from Colorado so we already like her!!)

Then we fixed the stereo, and said a quick tearful goodbye, and we were off to the cabin. (Gavin had been asking all day to go there and was at his whits end!)

In the morning we dropped a couple things at her door and headed home to Saint George. I am not going to say that I didn't cry then....nor now....but she really is ready for this next adventure, and we are excited to be a small part of it.

And as we have taught Gavin to say when the see's the Y on the mountain......"Go Cougars!" and now "Go Jocelyn"